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I got a queen’s reception for what should have been a basic human kindness
Tag: Effort
IDGAF
Yes, I just saw this on a license plate the other day. A woman had it proudly emblazened on the license plate on the front of her car. You could tell that she was very pleased with herself, thought of herself as a true bad-ass.
I had some different thoughts about it. You know what those initials mean, right? It means I don’t give a fuck. I..don’t…give…a…fuck. I think to her, that means no one is going to tell her what to do or command her to give an opinion on anything. For her, that is stating some sense of power.
I see it differently. First, why “say” something like that out loud and not even use the words, just the initials? Why not spell it all out? Is she afraid of getting in trouble? Can she not even say it? That sounds like cowardice to me.
My impression is that when someone says that, they think they are making a power statement, but what they are really saying is that they refuse to make an investment of any sort in any idea or belief. They refuse to hold anything of importance enough to take stock in it or stand up for it. They are stubborn and weak at the same time. They are not actually taking control of anything. They are actually giving up on everything. They are refusing to put the work in. It’s a no win situation.
To say you don’t give a fuck/don’t care about anything means that you are giving up on the world around you. You are determined to not participate or find joy in anything. This is no way to live. I don’t understand it. I get that you get down after life has thrown you a crap ton of curve balls. Sometimes things get pretty shitty. I get it. I have been there. I have survived multiple cancers, almost lost my husband to heart disease and faced potential financial ruin multiple times…and I still give a fuck! If I can do it, you can too.
Dr. Katz
Embrace where you are now, but don’t forget where you have been.
I feel grateful every day just to be above ground and be reasonably physically and mentally healthy. I have a great family. I have rebuilt bridges. I have strengthened old relationships and built new ones. I am attempting to take even better care of myself and make myself a priority. I have made myself a mission of positivity that I attempt to fulfill at least once a day, no matter how small the triumph.
Wow! It seems like a lot of work doesn’t it? Frankly, it is, but so Worth IT! There are days when I get tired and don’t feel like putting in an effort. That’s when I have to stop and remember where I was even a year or two ago: somewhat depressed, frustrated, lonely despite people surrounding me, full of cancer trying to take my life, not able to work like I wanted to help support my family, mentally swirling with guilt and self-induced feelings of failure.
I have come a long way since then, but in order to keep my current path intact, I need to keep in mind where I came from and the lessons it taught me. I learned that no one can fully heal all of me but me. No one can really help assure my future without my help and driving force. I need to be mindful and grateful of the “good days” even if thrybaten’t as frequent as I would like. I learned that there isn’t always a tommorow, so I better make damn sure that today is the best I can muster. Nobody can do that for me. I’ve got to care enough to do it myself.
Dr. Katz